First Google:
and now, twitter:
I know a lot of you probably think I’m still a wee bit dotty about this, butt as they say, just because you’re paranoid, doesn’t mean they aren’t following you.
Let’s review.
First, on 12-May-2011 Big Guy’s Cyber Security Czar, Howard A. “Smitty” Schmidt’s Net Neutrality goons crashed Google’s entire Blogger system in a misguided attempt to silence my little blog.
Cyber Security Czar Howard A. Schmidt: who is he and where did he come from?
It caused unprecedented disruption throughout the intertubes taking down such esteemed sites as Doug Ross, JammieWearingFool, Legal Insurrection, theblogprof, Ann Althouse and just about everybody who’s anybody in the blogging world (and, like me, are cheapskates and still using Google’s free platform).
Raj’s super-secure firewall kept them out of my dashboard and the super-secret IP masking circuitry bounced my trail all over the intertubes, making their job difficult. The government goon squad finally stopped looking for me when “my IP address” led them to the Kenyan Department of Health’s 1961 birth certificates.
I knew they wouldn’t be able to keep Blogger off line for long because Google i$ one of our bigge$t $upporter$ and we really need them to WTF.
So I thought we could relax for a while, butt then my BBFFL (Best Blogging Friend For Life) Barbara Curtis of Mommy Life fame discovers that Smitty’s goons are monitoring her tweets! First, they came for Mommy Life. Can MOTUS be far behind?
[BREAKING OFF TOPIC NEWS: Scamper on over to the MommyLife giveaway post to enter to win some really fun free stuff! You’ll thank me for this tip.]
Back on topic: It seems that Smitty is monitoring the tweets of a whole bunch of conservative bloggers. I’m not sure if he is building Big Guy’s “Enemies List” for our next Net Neutrality sweep, or if he is just looking to amass ideas from the opposition camp that can be temporarily co-opted to WTF. Little Mo is investigating as we speak.
Big Guy’s cyber nerds monitoring the world-wide net 24/7
If you tweet (like I do), they might be monitoring you too. You can check it out here @BarackObamaVote. They are following more than 1,800 tweeters right now. I didn’t see my twitter account in the “following” list, although I’m sure they are just masking it. Butt I see that somehow they have forced me to follow them! Little Mo is investigating this as well.
I’ll keep you all posted as updates become available. In the meantime, may I suggest you all keep your tinfoil hats nearby.
And now I understand the Google Androids have been trained to spy on us as well.
Where, exactly is a paranoid mirror supposed to turn?
To paraphrase Darth Vader:
“Give yourself to the Dark Side. It is the only way you can save your friends. Yes, your thoughts betray you. Your feelings for them are strong… Butt now your failure is complete. If you will not turn to the Dark Side…”
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