Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Butt, butt…now back to the real “news”

I know you’d like me to continue to investigate the Big Butt theory as propagated by WaPo. Butt frankly the charges of racism against those who talk about Lady M’s rather ample caboose have been amply covered by others on the intertoobs such as BLUR-BRAIN:

Michelle-Obama-Smurf-Butt

h/t: Gerard

 White House Dossier (h/t: ImNoDhimmi) and SadHill News:

michelle-obama-fat-overweight-heavy-oprah-butt-large-posterior-sad-hill-news-1

Butt really; it’s time to Move On.Org and I’ve been assigned the all important job of changing the narrative. Because while we may not have any bigger butts -

your message here copy

we do have bigger fish to fry. For example what, exactly, will Lady M be spending her time on for these next 4 years? MsNBC thinks they have an inside track on that:

Despite her success with those marquee campaigns [ed.“No Child’s Fat Behind, I Red heart Military Families], feminists have criticized the First Lady for her self-described moniker of “mom-in-chief.”

“What’s lost often in the story of Michelle Obama is that this was a former career woman,” said Marie Claire Magazine features editor Lea Goldman to Chris Jansing. “She had a very high profile career as a hospital administrator. She’s a trained lawyer. We don’t often hear about that when we talk about Michelle Obama.

I feel compelled to remind Marie Claire Magazine features editor Lea Goldman that there is a very good reason for that. Her “very high profile career as a hospital administrator” was marred by charges that her principle responsibility as Vice President of Community Relations was – how shall I put it? – patient dumping. I believe that’s the technical term.

patient dumping

Butt don’t just take my word for it; it’s been well documented by people with far better sources than I have.

And regarding that “trained lawyer” designation: well that’s putting a very fine spin on the “voluntarily surrendered” law license incident. Let the record reflect that one does not just wake up one day and say to one’s self “gee, a don’t really think I need that law license that I worked so hard to get anymore." And if you don’t believe me, ask your lawyer. Even if she’s retired.

So, sorry Betty, for the time being it’s “mom-in-chief” for MO.

friedanBetty Freidan, founding member of the Femi-Nazis, rolls over in her grave

Butt since MO is still more popular than God, what, you ask, should she do with all that good will?

“She’s going to support her husband in terms of the Organizing for America initiative to try and get communities to rally around the President’s initiatives,” said Wallace. “She’s going to be supporting that agenda but I think she’s going to be using her personal and political capital a little bit more on some of these other issues that may sometimes be apolitical.”

Yep. Apolitical issues, like your children’s fat butts, and spearheading the counterattack on the Republicans’ War Against Women.

And could a run for political office be in Michelle Obama’s future?

“She says no, no, no, no, no but she’s so amazing out on that campaign trail,” said Wallace to Chris Jansing. “You have to wonder if 5 years from now she’s going to say I’m pretty good– why don’t I give it a shot?”

On the outside chance that MO might decide to open that trap door and get her fair shot at running for some political office – say the First Black Female Commander-in-Chief (FiB-CiC) – she’s going to need a little more international experience. I’m not saying she should be Secretary of State. That’s way too much work, and Lady M’s way too educated to just be a secretary.

candydatemichelleh/t Gerard

I would suggest she get more international experience (beyond her trip to Kitzbuhel) by adding some international women’s issues to her resume. There surely are enough issues that she could adopt, such as the Saudi’s concern with a woman’s right to drive. And then there’s this Egyptian stigma about women being unclean, or something because we all know how important proper hygiene is. And then there’s this situation where the International Fruit Council would certainly welcome her involvement in overcoming old stereotypes of bananas being considered too phallic for public consumption in some parts of the world. She could really help out there.

banana-Randyh/t: “RC the Vietnam Geezer”

Or if she’s feeling really brave maybe MO could even speak out against this type of thing; because in certain parts of the world the War on Women is real, not just a rhetorical red herring used for propaganda purposes. She’d really buy herself some chops if she could negotiate this niggling (can I use that word?) little issue with the Mullahs.

Butt more likely Lady M will settle in for the occupation as head cheerleader for Big Guy’s endless summer campaign; the Organizing Against America initiative.

CNN has confirmed that Obama for America will transform into a non-profit, tax-exempt group, that will attempt to leverage the re-election campaign's powerful grassroots organization and social media operation, as well as its rich voter database and vast email distribution list, to build up public support for the president as he pushes for agreements over the debt ceiling and the federal budget, gun control legislation, immigration reform, and other objectives.

After all, these are the issues that are important to Americans. All our polls tell us so.

CD-TemplateBe sure to get the complete set!

So look for MO to emerge from her chrysalis as the Administrations new  Minister of Truth.

Michelle-Obama_2106266cgovt-propaganda-mainstream-media

That would, of course, be in addition to her current responsibilities as Minister of our Quantitative Eating program:

mo eats at inaugural lunch

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