Your Government Loves You. To Death.

“All that was needed was shrewd questioning...to conclude once again that the symptoms of love were the same as those of cholera.” ― Gabriel Garcí­a Márquez, Love in the Time of Cholera

A riddle for you: when is a tax not a tax?

1. When it is a tithe
2. When it is insurance
3. When the Supreme Court says so
4. All of the above

Arguably the answer is #4, all of the above, butt the most correct response is #2, when it’s “insurance,” of course. Specifically, when it’s government mandated insurance that you buy for your own good and/or the good of society at large. Because your government loves you to death.

Take guns for example, you may soon need a government mandated insurance policy that will compensate any victims harmed should your firearm accidently and/or randomly discharge itself while a stranger is breaking into your home.

Pretty compelling argument, and one that those of you who clung to the slippery slope theory during the Obamacare debate will recognize:

…if the government can force you to purchase a product such as insurance to regulate private activity, is there any human commercial engagement which they could not regulate?

Hee hee hee: regulate and tax? Of course not! Welcome to Obamanopoly: just pay $200 and go directly to jail.

So: a gun tax it is. What do you suppose the excise tax on these babies is going to be?

Be sure to tune in next week when I cover the newest deficit reduction plan: mandatory insurance on free speech. This policy will provide damages in the event your government regulated hate speech causes lowered self-esteem, dependence on controlled substances or a murderous rampage by the victim of your hate. The O-Team is also considering requiring anyone exercising their First Amendment right to purchase a “victim of gun violence” policy too. Because even if you don’t own a gun, you probably have a big mouth! And if you can afford to shoot off your mouth, you can afford to pay a little bit more. (Media and other propagandist organizations will be exempted, of course.)

Linked By: American Digest, and Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and NOBO2012 on Free Republic, Thanks!