Wednesday, July 10, 2013

Out of Broccoli. Loccoli!

Have you ever owned a dress or a suit that’s so inexorably associated with the loathsome event you wore it to that you just wanted to burn it when you got home?  Yeah, who hasn’t, right?

I sure would’ve pegged the Goldilocks dress from the humiliating Copenhagen IOA rejection of the WONs pitch for the 2016 Olympics as a candidate for the bonfire of the vanities.

yelllow bomb in copenhagen Maybe you don’t understand the concept of humiliation when it’s never your fault

Given all the hype (Oh O Oh!):

“Wow! If you think Lady M created a buzz here in Copenhagen, you should see the Oprah adulation. It’s scary to think what will happen when Big Guy gets in later tonight. The best Brazil could do was Pele.”

- combined with MO’s tear-inducing personal story and pitch, the IOA’s rejection of Chicago in round one of the Olympics selection was just an embarrassment. The professional home team was skunked by a bunch of amateurs from Rio de Janeiro!

 jesus_in_rio[3]No O-Lympics for Chicago

Not only that, butt as you may recall, the food wasn’t very good in Copenhagen either:

copenhagenjpg_thumb[6]

“Lunch was a bust: smorgasbord. Again. They do love fishy little things on bread with pickles over here. Oprah was not pleased either.”

Speaking of food, that brings me back to the latest sighting of the “golden frock of humiliation” - at the annual “Kids State Dinner”at the Big White yesterday.

173181189Lost the mini-me, added new sooper-strength containment system:

mo's backsideMichelle Obama Second Annual Kids State Dinner N_IGy_fXayWx

In case you lose track of all our celebratory events, the “Kids State Dinner” is actually an annual luncheon held to celebrate the winners of Lady M’s healthy recipe contest for 8-12 year olds. Because 8-12 year olds know more about good nutrition than almost anyone except Lady M and her Sooper-Chef, Sammy Kass.

This year we once again honored 54 winners; 1 from each state. (I know what you’re thinking: “What happened to the winners from the other states MOTUS?” Depending on how you count Big Guy’s “57 states and one left to go” plus Alaska and Hawaii that Big Guy’s handlers “couldn’t justify” we’re missing either 3 or 6. As I noted last year, states that raise too much red meat were disqualified due to their wanton disregard for Lady M’s health initiatives.)

Last year’s winning entries included yummy sauerkraut sloppy Joes and baked kale chips - a huge hit:

kale chips mmm mmm mmm_thumb[5]Mmm, mmm, mmm! Thanks Lady M!

This year’s winners promised more of the same, only better. Like “Bring it On, Brussels Sprout Wrap,” “Nummy No-Noodle Lasagna,” and - my personal favorite - “Stone Curry with Brown Rice.” Although I think that last one might be taking the locavore farm to table movement a bit too far. I’ll grant you, it sounds sustainable, butt beyond that I’m not sure how nutritious it is. If you want to try it though, it’s in this handy little book of recipes helpfully provided by Lady M’s little people; and helpfully funded by you - Big Guy’s little people! So give yourselves a round of applause.

I haven’t personally tried any of the recipes yet, butt Little Mo has and he highly recommends this year’s winning entry from Alabama:

little mo and broccoliMmm, mmm, mmm! That’s good broccoli!

P.S. In case you missed the big news last night: We went over the 4,500,000 visitor mark! Thank you everybody and congratulations to Robin H who was 4,500,000!

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Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network