Poor Joey. He’s been under a lot of pressure lately.
Being Numero Duo for so long has taken its toll in gaffes. And while we’re all used to his off-key notes by now, apparently the rest of the world isn’t as forgiving. They’re still a little off-put by being accused of aiding and abetting terrorists. So over the weekend Turkey’s President Erdogan and Abu Dhabi’s Crown Prince Mohamed bin Zayed both demanded apologies from the Veep.
“Wait, what? What did I say now?”
In fact Joey’s been so distracted by all the problems in the world - like who’s done the most to earn the nod to run as the Democratic nominee for president -
that he hasn’t had time to focus on insignificant things like numbers. So he inadvertently began adding and subtracting zeroes at will (161 – 161,000; what difference at this point does it make?).
After a week of little slip-ups, Joey B volunteered to play “Are you smarter than a 5th grader?” in order to bolster his presidential creds.
Let’s start out slowly, with some 2nd grade number bonds; are you ready Joey?
“OK, ready; can I use my toes too?”
Here we go:
Maybe we can stop right here, before we need to drop back to pre-school number bondings. And remember, none of this matters in politics anyway; competence only counts in winning elections and Ebola outbreaks.
And the Democrats are so competent at elections they are even looking to weaponize Ebola to use to their benefit in the midterms.
Yessir, it’s sure a good thing we didn’t end up with a vice president like Sarah Palin isn’t it? Because what good would plain speaking common sense do when we’re faced with existential threats like war and pestilence? She’d probably try to do something stupid like shutting the borders and banning flights into the country from Ebola hot zones. Silly girl.
“How to stop Ebola? No, no, don’t tell me, I have this one! Wash your hands! Right?”
Right.
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Cross-Posted and Featured on Patriot Action Network