FLOTUS Past and FLOTUS Present Demonstrate the Danger of Gaseous Veggies

 “Hillary, Hillary, Hillary! That’s all I ever hear!” (apologies to Marcia Brady)

It was inevitable; when you’ve been the center of the universe for so long there was bound to be a little blowback when a former FLOTUS tries to take center stage again.

Especially when it’s time to open the Garden of Good and Evil and all the usual paparazzi are busy chasing after the old interloper’s Scooby van instead of filming the ritual of the annual rhubarb dance, (first seen here in 2010:

Getting back to our roots, 2010 edition of the “rhubarb dance” with former Chef Sammy

Oh yeah, it’s a real thing

Except for the dearth of media coverage, this year’s event - which took place on Tax Day - was no different. First we had the arrival of the Queen of the Rutabagas,

Hellooo! I’m baa-ack!

followed by the annual rhubarb dance – a pagan ritual imploring Gaia to protect us from global warming deniers for another year – and finally the planting of this year’s crop of cruciferous vegetables, where they are all laid to rest.

Turnips to the left, rutabagas to the left of left

Most of the actual  planting of the Won’s Victory Garden is conducted by little children who have been inducted from around the country for this special work. Lady M serves as head horticulturist, instructing the children on the proper care and tending of the turnips and a rutabagas. 

What’s the difference between turnips and rutabaga?

I’m glad you asked!

TMI? Okay, let’s keep this simple:

GENERAL:

They are both root vegetables and a part of the Brassica genus.

The confusing part is that there are many similarities: they’re both root vegetables, and share a similar shape, colour, texture and flavour. However, there are many differences as well. Here’s a breakdown of the differences between these two awesome root vegetables.

APPEARANCE:

Turnip leaves are usually light green, thin and hairy, while the rutabaga’s leaves are bluish-green, thick and smooth.

Okay, that wasn’t really helpful. What else?

While both turnips and rutabaga can have a purple crown, rutabagas are typically larger than turnips.

Nope, still having trouble here.

Rutabagas have a rough exterior that is normally coated in wax.

photos courtesy of Madame Tussaud’s

Wow! I had no idea this would be so hard! Let’s try one more thing:

TEXTURE:

They share similar textures since they are both root vegetables that are crunchy when raw and have a tender bite when cooked.

Again, I got nothin’ people. I think the only logical conclusion we can draw is - what difference, at this point, does it make?

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Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network