Soccer ‘R Not Us

I know - it seems like it’s been going on forever! And still two weeks to go. It’s not the World Cup itself, it’s the Google Doodles. How many more of these stupid multicultural soccer gifs on its header (hee, hee) do we have to endure? 48 so far, and counting:

Yeah, Team USA lost to the chocolate people - and no, that’s not racist, it’s just who they are:

Sure, it would have been nice to win something for a change, as we’ve been on a losing streak for a while now. First we were handed a bitter loss when the 2011 World Cup games were stolen from us by Quatar while we were still stinging from our loss of the 2016 Olympic Games to Brazil (now that was racist). And that’s why Brazil is the the only nation south of our former border that we are allowed to officially hate.

So, with our loss to Belgium we’re out of the World Cup playoffs; yawn. Everybody around here is more concerned about our 13 game, 9 to zip losing streak against the Supreme Court. This has made our relentless march to nullify the Constitutional limits on Big Guy’s powers somewhat of an uphill battle. Even Monday’s narrow 5 to 4 loss at the hand of the Supremes has some people spooked (not in a racist way), mumbling things like “if we can’t implement our plan to end the Republicans’ War on Women® what can we implement?”  I’ve even heard some whispers of “What next? The Senate?”

So I’m going to go out on a limb and predict that basketball and football are still safe around here, even in the age of Obama. Because Bo’s always found b-ball more compelling than soccer:

And we still really like spiking the football:

Although our Secretary of State clearly favors soccer, as he should:

Jean Carré, reporting for duty

POSTSCRIPT:  A bit late for Canada Day, butt fun anyway -

h/t to my Bro, eh?

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Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

“Bin Laden is dead and General Motors is alive!” Or vice versa.

 

*Actual Results May Vary

Even as bumper sticker slogans go, it was a bit dubious from the start. Now it looks like it was actually the other way around.

The claim seemed bogus from the moment the angry mob in Cairo chanted “Obama! Obama! There are still a billion Osamas!” right up through this month’s resurgence of al Qaeda in Iraq.

And as far as GM goes, it appears that rumors of its survival may have been exaggerated as well. Despite life support efforts that included the removal of crushing debt from its books and infusions of billions in special future tax breaks, GM managed to lose one-third of its value in less than 2 years. And now it’s official: GM really hasn’t made a car in the past 20 years that hasn’t been recalled!

GM wouldn’t exist today butt for a U.S. government bailout; apparently the same can be said of al Qaeda in Iraq. Maybe we should stop bailing out losers at home as well in the Middle East. And here’s another idea: how about we focus on taking guns away from al Qaeda instead of U.S. citizens?

*Actual Results May Vary

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From Piñatas to Panties

I was HOPE-ing to stay warm, dry and out of sight of our mounting scandals, thereby avoiding the distasteful task of dealing with the call for “gently used” underwear for our gazillion new wee citizens from across the border.

Who ordered the 500,000 Trojans?

Butt then Gerard reminded me that I am the Keeper of Lady M’s Fashion Flame and, ever since Madonna, underwear is fashion.

So it looks like I’m going to have to wade into this abyss. Thankfully, Diogenes’ Middle Finger has done most of the heavy lifting (so-to-speak) for me:

photo credit: Diogenes’ Middle Finger

As always, Lady M sacrificed - even though she doesn’t get paid for it - by sending several sets of her surplus extra-large  “gently used”  “un-used” panties to the immigrant relief effort. Perhaps you should send some too. I would, butt I’m a gadget and don’t wear, um, under-garments.

And while I appreciate the efforts of my fellow blogger to bring us the truth,  I do have to question the provenance of the panties in that picture: I seriously doubt those bloomers ever graced our First Fanny because, as you all know, Lady M definitely prefers thongs.  Remember, even post-Madonna, the panties go on under the containment structure.

Well, that’s my opinion and I’m sticking with it. What’s yours?

Please Join The Panties-for-Piñatas Campaign Today 

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Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Another Day, Another Crisis

When Rahm Emmanuel advised “never let a good crisis go to waste” he knew of what he spoke. And we have exploited every last one of them – both God-made and man-made. Now, 6 years later, the crises continue…

“So ... we have to use the crisis — that some view as a crisis, and it does have crisis qualities — as an opportunity to show who we are as Americans, that we do respect people for their divinity and worth.” - Nancy Pelosi, at our former Mexican border June 28, 2014.

almost as if…somebody was planning them.

Butt if you believe that the rush of unescorted illegal alien children across our border is an Organizing For America tactic, you must be one of those Tea Party nuts. And if you object to it, you must be a racist.

Oddly, it would seem as if anybody with half a brain should know that America can’t simply absorb all the troubles in the world into its borders and still manage to be that shining city on a hill, a beacon of liberty and democracy for the rest of the world. Hard to see how usurping our freedom and liberty will serve to advance it around the world isn’t it?

Which brings us once again to that age-old nagging question: ignorant or nefarious?

“Can’t I just eat my taco.”

Meanwhile, we remain in the hands of those who would surrender our freedom for a few votes:

“We shall not overcome” as long as these clowns are in town

until such time as the natives grow restless.

On The Border: Al Stewart

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Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

HOPE: Our New Squirrel

A very busy day: After expressing his outrage in Lake Harriet, Minnesota about the phony scandals drummed up by the do-nothing Republicans:

The Erler family enjoys Big Guy’s message of HOPE at the Lake Harriet Band Shell

Note, little Joey brought his squirrel in case BO forgot to bring his own (he didn’t)

BO returned to D.C. to have dinner at BLT Steak with MO and Sasha

before attending the Marine Barracks Parade last evening.

Whew! What a day!

Yeah, that’s it: stay hopeful, America.

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Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

Bead-Dazzlers for Replicants

Today’s reflection: jewelry

Specifically, what does your neck jewelry say about you?

I know there are still a lot of disturbing things going on, butt don’t worry, Big Guy is still out there “working for you” “every day” despite all of those “phony scandals” “geared towards winning elections or ginning up a base.” So if he can take some time off to golf, we can take some time off to discuss bling.

Besides, BHO has made it perfectly clear that we need to lighten up. So, since it’s Friday, it’s summer and this is a fashion blog let’s talk about necklaces. I’ve noticed that liberal women tend to favor big beads and pearl necklaces:

From their Congresswomen,

To their Senators,

First Ladies,

State Department spokesmouths:

and even their Womyn’s Reproductive Rights spokesmouths:

They all favor the beaded, choker style necklace. What is it, do you suppose? A secret Fem-Dem sorority symbol that you find out about only after someone opens those trap doors for you? A talisman of some sort? A discreet way to carry your prayer beads?

Or is it simply a product of liberal mind melding?  You know, the sheeple phenomenon?

I suppose we could blame Jackie for these fashion replicants,

Butt I blame Obama:

Oh my! Look at the time! I’ve got to run.

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Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network

A shining city on the hill, or the proverbial end of the line? Just asking.

It’s like the The Never Ending Story meets the Bad News Bears: the VA implosion, the implosion of Iraq, the implosion at the border, the implosion of IRS computer hard drives (along with the EPA’s) and now, the implosion of the economy. And that’s just in the past month!

…a giant sucking sound

Imagine how you’d feel if you were president and had to find out about all of this when you tuned into the evening news. Without so much as a heads up before another disaster strikes it’s hard to “frame the discussion” properly. Which is to say, it’s hard to effectively shift the blame away from yourself and back onto your predecessor (as an aside: read about how Bush is now officially the longest serving U.S. President in history, edging FDR out by 2 full terms).

Butt with things going from bad to worse in Iraq, even Big Guy would rather focus on the lame economy:

Remember when in January 2014, Q1 GDP was expected to rise 2.6%? Well, here comes the final Q1 GDP revision and it's a doozy: at -2.9%, far below the -1.8% expected and well below the -1.0% second revision, it is an absolute disaster, and is the worst print since Q1 2009.

I’m not sure how anyone could be surprised that the country experienced negative growth (i.e. “honey, I’ve shrunk the economy!”) in the first quarter.

I mean, what else can you expect when 93 million Americans have dropped out of the workforce resulting in the lowest labor participation rate since Jimmy Carter, another 11 million have somehow joined the ranks of the sick, lame and lazy, and 46 million Americans are on food stamps.

Wow! If this is a recovery, Detroit is a boom town.

BOOM! Implosion of the old Hudsons store, in the middle of downtown Detroit.

NOTE: demolished, 1998, site still vacant today

 

Detroit: what do you see? The shining city on the hill, or the proverbial end of the line?

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and American Digest (Go Wish AD a Happy 11th Birthday), and @batfreight, @Standlow, @dchrist81, @AnnDaybreak on twitter, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

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If you must whine, at least whine like a girl.

Question: What’s the difference between fine wine,

Laura poses with India the cat

and a fine whiner?

Grumpy Cat get’s her bangs on

Answer: one enhances anything it is served with, the other, well, what’s the opposite of “enhances”?

Laura Bush: 

In a sneak-peek for a special “First Ladies” interview with C-SPAN, former First Lady Laura Bush responds to a question about whether or not the president’s spouse should get a salary. She replies that she doesn’t “think so,” because “there are plenty of perks.”

Lady M:

About life in the White House: “Don’t ask! It’s hell. I can’t stand it!”

About a 9-11 ceremony: “All this for a damn flag?”

About her job as FLOTUS:  “it’s a really nice prison.” (and, she doesn’t get paid for it!)

So, as the world burns and our stomachs churn, BO holds a “Working Family Summit,” and has lunch at Chipotle with a hand selected diverse group of people concerned about such things. Meanwhile, Lady M lectures us on why we need a female president “as soon as possible” because “this country is ready for anyone who can do the job."

Well yes; I suppose after five and a half years, having “anyone who can do the job” would be refreshing, wouldn’t it?

Anyway, I wonder if Lady M has any woman particular in mind for president, or if any “female” would fill the bill.

I’m guessing the answers are “yes” and “no.” What do you think?

Linked By: Larwyn’s Linx on Doug Ross@Journal, and @Standlow, @ladydshops, @ValCSilver, @GingerMarple on twitter, and BlogsLucianneLoves, and Free Republic, Thanks!

Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network