I got an email from the DNC yesterday and I totally misread the subject line: I thought it said “BBQ Barack.”
BBQ with Barack
Honestly, MOTUS, Labor Day weekend is always a lot of fun, but I can’t think of a better way to close out the summer than at a barbecue with Barack. He’s even been known to man the grill on occasion.
And while he and I may not always agree on the best way to build a burger, we both know how critical these next few weeks are going to be for Democrats across the country. Now is the time to make sure we have the resources we’ll need for a win in November.
MOTUS, will you chip in $3 to help us out — and to be automatically entered for the chance to fly out to meet Barack?
Thanks,
Joe
I thought they were planning one of those classic “Celebrity Roasts” butt I should have known that was wrong - Barry being as prickly and famously thin-skinned as he is.
It actually read: “BBQ With Barack” – they’re raffling off a chance to “man the grill” with Big Guy! So to speak.
Yum-mo! Look at that little black shriveled up piece of meat! (Is that racist?)
Umm, thanks Joe, for the invite, butt no. I’ll be in Detroit that weekend, marching in a Labor Day parade.
Units of the American Federation of Labor (Amalgamated Fighting Butchers Local 630) marching in the Detroit Labor Day Parade (1938).
Or something:
Detroit motorcycle police on Labor Day weekend 1954, preparing for the influx of holiday traffic. I sure hope they don’t act stupidly.
I tell you what though, I’ll send a crock of my homemade baked beans to pass around at the BBQ,
…and you guys can stick around tooting Big Guy’s horn all night long.
Hey, I’ve got an idea! How about a baked bean recipe throw down! I’m sure Barry and Bobby would approve.
Come on man, pay attention! You can’t just throw things on the fire and walk away!
I’m assuming that, like me, you’re already kinda’ bored with the Wons bike ridin’.
And have seen all you want of our DIC (Dweeb-In-Chief):
Are those white anklets!?! What a dweeb!
So I say we move on to an entirely different kind of Ride.
Now I know, we just did this a week or so ago, butt seriously: can you ever have too many posts about classic cars? And while there are thousands of “classic car cruise nights” all across America, the biggest and the bestest takes place on the third Saturday of August in metropolitan Detroit, home of the American automobile. Dubbed the “Dream Cruise” - shorthand for the “American Dream Cruise” - the cruisers celebrate the American Dream, which in no small part relied on the independence created by owning a set of wheels to help you move up and on. Which is why a car will soon be a human right in Detroit, along with food, water and cable TV.
The official cruise starts at 9:00 AM today butt the 16 mile route along historic Woodward Avenue has been filled with classic cars, muscle cars, street rods, and custom vehicles all week.
Pre-cruisers bring their lawn chairs to watch the parade of cars along Woodward Friday night
Here are a few of my favorite shots from the pre-cruise:
‘54 Corvette convertible
“63 Corvair convertible
‘66 AC Cobra
‘58 Oldsmobile Super 88
So go ahead, post your favorite classic ride again. It’s summer and, all rumors to the contrary, it’s still America. And we are all tired to death of the antics of our “Ride On!” Presidential-Resident-In-Chief” (do the math yourself on the acronym).
So return with me if you will, to a much simpler time in America. When the American car was king and Barry was just a little tyke on a bike instead of the PRIC he is. (Okay, I did it for you. You’re welcome.).
Whoa - that’s a sweet ride in the background! I can’t identify it for sure, butt I sure hope it’s not a Corvair. Those suckers were unsafe at any speed!
Who would have predicted that in the 6th Year of Obama there would be race-fueled rioting and looting going on in America’s heartland while the American President danced and golfed on Martha’s Vineyard?
You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life See that girl, watch that scene, digging the Dancing Queen
And speaking of Dancing Queens, I suppose you’ve heard that David Gregory is officially leaving Meet the Press in order to spend more time dancing with his family?
You're a teaser, you turn 'em on Leave them burning and then you're gone
He will be replaced by the highly respected JournOlist Chuck Todd
You come in to look for a king Anybody could be that guy
So, fans of Meet the Press, meet your new toad:
same as your old toad:
And good luck Chucky, you’ve got some really big shoes to fill here:
So here’s my humble advice, Chuck; brush up on your dance steps, and soon you’ll be dancin’ with the stars too.
You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life See that girl, watch that scene, digging the Dancing Queen
By all accounts Hillary apologized profusely to Big Guy,
“I’m sorry I threatened to eat you, little dog. I completely forgot you were black for a minute there.”
And now everything is the way it used to be:
“You can stop chewing on my ear now.”
And now Hilz and Beary are best friends forever again.
And remember kids: Sometimes you get the bear, and sometimes the bear gets you:
Obama, we have been told, is frustrated, “restless,” bored with the responsibilities and chores of office. He thinks of himself as the bear—intimidating, wild, untamed, roving—escaping his den. But he is flattering himself. Obama is not the bear. He is the cub: aimless, naïve, self-interested, self-indulgent, irresponsible, irresolute.The bear is…(fill in the blank)
Boy, it’s not just Ferguson, Missouri; racism is breaking out all over the place. For example, have you seen what Dana Milbank wrote?
President Obama must really be teed off.
Hillary Rodham Clinton, his once-loyal secretary of state and his likeliest successor, has gone rogue, criticizing his foreign policy as too timid.
Obama responded with not one but two rounds of golf.
And even Jimmy Fallon is writing racist jokes now:
“After spending yesterday at the beach, Obama said, “This has been fun, but I should really get back...to the golf course.”
What is it with the obsession with Big Guy’s vacation? When candidate Obama said this about PRESIDENTIAL VACATIONS in 2008 did people think that he meant it literally?
“You have to understand that if you seek that office, then you have to be prepared to give your life to it. Essentially, the bargain that I think every President strikes with the American people is, ‘you give me this office, then in turn my fears, doubts, insecurities, foibles, need for sleep, family life, vacations, leisure, is gone. I am giving myself to you.”
Racists everywhere are asking “can we give him back?”
In other Obama-vacation news, BO rubbed elbows with a crowd of fellow vacationers and told them he was having fun despite Globull Warming having caused the ocean to be unusually cold this year. And he said that the first family spent time with some seals on the beach on Monday:
"We were hanging out with some seals this afternoon who came by and said hello," he said.
Like many of us, Mork, father of Mearth, yearned for a return to a simpler time; for the Happy Days:
In the end however, the current world proved too much for Mork from Ork.
And although his job was that of a comic, he wasn’t really like that; he was actually more of a nerdy student when he was young. Was he the class clown? Au contraire:
"No, no, I was PRESIDENT OF THE CLASS, " pronounces Williams, giving the honor the deep-ringing reverence it deserves. "I loved school, maybe too much really. I was summa cum laude in high school. I was driven that way. I can't say it was easy to fit in. I just went out of my way to fit in. It was a private boys school, Detroit Country Day, and I played soccer. I was on the wrestling team. Mr. All-Around, you know?” – Detroit Free Press
In fact, he might actually have been the smartest man in the room.
Unlike the man who just thinks he’s the smartest man in the room but undoubtedly graduated somewhere much closer to the other end of the class.
Smokin’ doesn’t make you smart, it just makes you think you are.
Clinton attributed the rise of jihadists affiliated with Islamic State of Iraq and the Levant (ISIS or ISIL) in Syria to the White House's "failure" to do more to back other rebels who have been fighting the regime of Syrian President Bashar al-Assad since 2011.
"The failure to help build up a credible fighting force of the people who were the originators of the protests against Assad—there were Islamists, there were secularists, there was everything in the middle—the failure to do that left a big vacuum, which the jihadists have now filled," Clinton said.
Well thanks for that insight; too bad you didn’t have it at the time. Oh wait…what?! You did!?
In the Atlantic interview, Clinton noted she "advocated" doing more to support a "core group" of Free Syrian Army fighters opposed to Assad. She argued this would have, potentially, helped oust the Syrian leader and would have given the U.S. better knowledge of the situation in the country. Read more:
Too bad she didn’t mention that at the time. Oh, and speaking of other things she failed to mention at the time, there’s this about Iran’s nuclear program – she didn’t agree with that either:
"I’ve always been in the camp that held that they did not have a right to enrichment. Contrary to their claim, there is no such thing as a right to enrich.
You’ve probably heard about the successor organization to Ezra Klein’s super-secret JournOlist. This one calls itself the “Gamechanger Salon.”
A prominent CNN commentator, the top two political reporters for The Huffington Post, a Reuters reporter, the editor of The Nation magazine, a producer for Al Jazeera America television, a U.S. News & World Report columnist, and approximately two dozen Huffington Post contributors are among the more than 1,000 members of Gamechanger Salon.
Founded by leftwing activist Billy Wimsatt, the group is a secretive digital gathering of writers, opinion leaders, activists and political hands who share information, ideas and strategy via a closed Google group.
Seriously, the only surprise on that list is the Al Jazeera producer: we expected much more from them.
Here’s a look at some of the usual suspects amongst the “GAMECHANGERS.”
For starters, does anyone really believe that the president isn’t plugged in to world and domestic events wherever he goes? Is there something about literally being within the boundaries of the District of Columbia that improves his decision making abilities? Are there concerns about him not getting decent cellphone reception in Massachusetts? The notion that the president can’t do his job from anywhere in the world – with the vast array of technology he has at his disposal, the advisers, as well as foreign leaders, all just a phone call away – is pretty silly. - U. S. News and World Report
Oh Barack! You are so…tech savvy! What kind of balls do you use?
So to all you JournOlists out there who really, really helped change the game in America:
Go ahead, you can go on vacation now, your work here is done too.
Units of the American Federation of Labor (Amalgamated Fighting Butchers Local 630) marching in the Detroit Labor Day Parade (1938).
If you catch my drift.
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