Okay, It’s Official: Halloween is Today

As it turns out, “near Halloween” wasn’t near enough. While I thought yesterday was designated official Halloween hand-out night apparently I was mistaken. Not a soul; not one single trick-or-treater.

It was like waiting for Godot, a no-show

So I guess I need to mentally prepare myself again to be interrupted dozens of times throughout the evening in order to comply with the demands for loot from would-be evil-doers. I can’t believe I once thought this night was fun!

I’ve no idea what I must have been thinking, but once upon a time we entertained on Halloween, even during work years when it fell in the middle of the week. I know: insane, but it seemed fun at the time. I started with simple, just a pot of chili or maybe “ghoulash” but eventually branched out to more ambitious fun fare. One year I made Toad in a Hole, only with tenderloin instead of sausages and decorated the finished dish with little paper gravestones. Sometimes I made beef stew with ghostie-potatoes.

Yeah, cute: mine never turned out this well

Or sometimes just a spooky pizza if we did a lot of appetizers.

Then, as friends began to move away we started to turn off the lights and just went out to dinner until the witching hour had passed. Most recently it seems easier to just stay home and give in to the little gremlins demands. Yesterday we made Shepherd’s pie with real mashed potatoes but by the time suppertime rolled around we were both too tired to eat it. That’s when you know you’re getting too old to do Halloween properly.

Oh well, tonight we’ll enjoy leftovers, handout the (full-sized) Reese's and Kit Kat’s to what is now this neighborhood's second and even third generation of (mostly) adorable wee-ones. And we will celebrate the arrival of another autumn of crunchy leaves, morning mists, shortening days and cooler temps, while preparing to move into winter and all that entails.

Black Caterday

Okay, who did this?

The Black Bat Cat Squad

And as if Halloween isn’t scary enough as is, there’s this:

The Space Weather Prediction Center has issued a Strong Geomagnetic Storm Watch for Oct. 30 through Oct. 31. This watch has been posted due to a significant solar flare and Coronal Mass Ejection from the sun that occurred in the late morning on Oct. 28…The Space Weather Prediction Center has posted a level G3 Geomagnetic Storm Watch, which is considered strong.

“Strong” is smack dab in the middle of the 1-5 scale. So don’t expect much in the way of power system interruptions, but do expect, if you’re far enough north – and Michigan is – some spectacular Northern Lights like these previous events produced.

Marquette, MI

Sleeping Bear Bay, MI

Presque Isle, MI

Mackinac Bridge, MI

Viewing the Aurora, as with so many things in life, all boils down to timing and location, location, location.

And if you don’t believe me just ask this calico cat who staked out his location for viewing the Halloween festivities with great care and timing.

One of these things is not like the others.

Happy Caterday, Aurora Borealis, and likely official-Halloween-trick-or-treat-and-party day. Knock yourselves out with the sugar.

Selections Have Consequences

Look, I know Halloween isn’t until Sunday. But let’s face it, tomorrow night is going to be official Trick or Treat night most everywhere so you have to start preparing today. Here are a few tips to ensure your Halloween revelry will go as smooth as possible.

First: While not mandatory, home decoration has grown increasingly important over the past 2 decades. This year will be much more challenging due to all those pesky supply chain problems crimping our ability to buy more crap from China. Creativity may be required.

 Well played big orange house at the end of the block, well played!

Costumes, which have become de rigueur for the ‘treaters’ as well as the tricksters, may be in short supply as they also come mostly from China. Again, you may have to resort to some creative DIY tactics to set yourself apart from the run of the mill witch and goblin crowd.

“Oh yeah? Stop Meme.”

Finally – and we’ve discussed this before – you will want to ensure that you have an adequate supply of proper  treats, and that generally involves chocolate. Don’t think you can get away with handing out any old thing.

Remember: selections have consequences.

I only mention this as the Democrats’ $3.5 trillion Keynesian spending plan promises everyone full-sized Snickers bars but will end up handing out only hated (and racist) black licorice. That will not sit well, especially with the peeps who’ve grown accustomed to torching stuff when they don’t get what they want. It’s the Keynesian way.

Note: After wrangling with the Zazzle people, Raj informs me that the “Let’s Go Brandon. MAGA” stickers are now available once again at the MOTUS Store. The Wuhan Cootie Collection however remains on lock-down.

Score One For The Patriarchy!

I’m so old I remember the tired old feminist gibe about it taking 2 men to replace a woman. Perhaps that was a bit of hyperbole, given that it’s sometimes the other way round.

Daily Mail

Ten million dollars, wow! Now that sounds like hyperbole. The damages seem high I know, but then, Donald Trump was still in office when they fired him. Ten months into Joe Biden sized inflation that sounds about right, doesn’t it?  

These are the stickers Raj made for me. I’ve found them quite useful.

Way to go David and David’s attorneys! Even if there were valid reasons for your firing – and I’m not saying there were - thank you for making an example out of these practitioners of the jackassery game of “diversity and inclusion” in which white males are always the pawn. Seriously, don’t any of you people have sons?

Wake up Wokesters: if you play stupid games, you win stupid prizes.

Actual Jury verdict in the David Duvall v. Novant Health case

A Little Halloween Love Bird…

We’re headed off to Ann Arbor at 0700 as Raj has an early hour EMG. If you don’t know what an EMG is consider yourself lucky because as a rule it means you have nerve damage, plus it’s, um, kind of painful. Yuk.

So here’s all I’ve got today: a very cute but holiday, and gender, confused peach faced love bird.

First of all, it’s Halloween, bird brain, not Easter; no eggs involved. Secondly, this is Herbert, the peach faced love bird. He’s a boy. For goodness sake, males do not lay eggs. Nor do they have babies. How difficult is this? It doesn’t matter how much lipstick you put on, if you were born a Herbert YOU. CANNOT. HAVE. BABIES.  Halloween is scary enough, we don’t need to make it any creepier.

So, Herbert, allow me to extend a bit of practical advice: since you appear to be approaching peak ripeness,

might I suggest you fly off and hide somewhere until you hit the mushy stage? I’ve been “mushy” for awhile now and can attest to the fact that when you get there, nobody bothers you much anymore. In fact you become almost invisible which leaves you free to conduct stealth missions.

Just don’t get carried away with the knitting needles and nobody will get hurt.

Like Watching A Child Play With A Loaded Pistol

“Outsourcer’s dream?”  Try “sorcerer’s” dream…the apprentice is simply an inert conduit.

In semi-related news, I see they’ve finally found an acceptable fall guy (who isn’t female with a Hispanic surname) for Alec Baldwin:

The assistant director of “Rust” who reportedly handed Alec Baldwin the prop gun that killed Halyna Hutchins was fired from a previous production gig over another firearm incident…Halls had shouted that the weapon was a “cold gun” — meaning it was safe to use — before giving it to Baldwin, according to a search warrant issued on Friday.

Which I guess makes Baldwin - the guy who actually drew the gun, pointed the gun and pulled the trigger - nothing more than an unwitting accomplice to the disaster; an inept sorcerer’s apprentice.  Just like Joey.

But still guilty.

Stay Above The Fray: It’s Good For The Soul

 

A season for quiet reflection.

A time to choose the high road,

and stay just a bit above the fray.

The perspective is better there.

Guaranteed House Fire

Although Halloween isn’t until next Sunday I declare today the start of Halloween week as the local Authorities have relegated Saturday, October 30th as Trick-or-Treat day.

So time to turn your thoughts to the holiday that officially launches the Christmas season.

You might want to consider what sort of treats you intend to hand out as trick-or-treaters have grown much pickier and judgmental over the years.

Also note that while in days of yore disgruntled looters would be satisfied simply egging old Crabby Appleton’s house, the hijinks of the disaffected and disappointed have escalated in recent years.

Disgruntled Portlandians express their displeasure last Halloween

So think about that bag of candy before tossing it in the cart: just like in real life not all treats are equal.

And do not even THINK about the old banana/candy corn trick: so NOT funny.

Guaranteed house fire