We’re Going To The Super Bowl!

I know most of you won’t be watching the Super Bowl today and that’s fine. But we’ll be watching here at Casa MOTUS. You see, it’s a long tradition – watching as a former Detroit Lion performs magnificently and leads a new team to triumphant victory.

This time around it’s former Lion quarterback Matthew Stafford who will, quite possibly, lead the Rams offense to a Super Bowl championship in his first year as their QB. While I don’t relish giving LA officials any reason to celebrate their pathetic city, I’m here to tell you that Matthew Stafford deserves a Super Bowl ring.

He was Detroit's No. 1 pick in the 2009 NFL Draft, played hurt for his first two seasons before emerging as a reliable QB and a class act. He played for the Lions for 12 seasons, 12 long, dismal seasons like nearly every other Lions season in memory - the Lions have one playoff win since 1957, and now own the NFL's longest playoff win drought at 30 years.

The last time the Lions were #1 the Super Bowl didn’t even exist

The Lions have never been to a Super Bowl and never will, according to Raj, as long as they are owned by the Ford (yes, that Ford) family. The franchise is run more like a vanity business - existing more for ego gratification than success; as a result winning isn’t everything, in fact, it isn’t even a priority.

It’s worse than the curse of the goat

The team has repeatedly chewed up good athletes and spit them out, wasting their talents on perpetually mediocre teams with one or two good players because ownership never spends the sort of money needed to assemble a really good team.  As a result they go through infrastructure ‘rebuilding seasons’ every few years but never actually Build Back Better™. Their non-winning strategy  has either wasted or destroyed many a good athlete (e.g. Barry Sanders).

1999: they gave Barry Sanders a mural, but never a ring

This is the best any life-long Lions fan can hope for: to see one of their favorite Lions lead another team to victory. So while diehard Lions fans find us deplorable, we true loyalists have sworn our allegiance to Matthew Stafford who proved himself both loyal and true during his 12 years with the Lions. We’re not abandoning him now.

Even if he wears a different jersey and lives 3 time zones away.

And if you have no interest in football whatsoever this is for you:

HONK HONK!!

Resist We Much!

There are millions of people who think Al Gore invented the Internet for the sole purpose of spreading cat videos.

We should not be surprised then that this led to cats developing serious internet addictions.

Can’t stop watching the catjinks 

Which led to another sub-category of internet entertainment: videos for cats. Nine hours worth at a time for cats that have developed other serious personality disorders such as separation anxiety.

All of which explains the latest Internet assisted way to waste time. The meme is titled “There’s No Cat in This Picture,” in which there is. It started out easy enough.

But quickly escalated to expert status.

It was intended to help cats detox from their video addiction and reclaim their natural cat lives, pre-lockdown. It seems to have worked fine for cats but now people have become addicted to this meme and spend hours daily ruining their eyesight and practicing their mad cat de-camouflaging skills.

At least the truckers will have something to do while they continue to defy their respective government’s mandates and orders.

Resist We Much!

UPDATE: Wretched Gretchen issues a warning:

"My message is simple: reopen traffic on the bridge.

In Michigan, our economy continues to grow because of our hardworking people and innovative small businesses. Now, that momentum is at risk. Commercial traffic is at a standstill at the Ambassador Bridge and heavily backed up at the Blue Water Bridge. 

The blockade is having a significant impact on Michigan’s working families who are just trying to do their jobs. Our communities and automotive, manufacturing, and agriculture businesses are feeling the effects. It’s hitting paychecks and production lines. That is unacceptable. 

Because lockdowns that ruin small businesses are only acceptable when government tyrants do it.

The Week Canada Saved the USA.

The Week Canada Liberated the United States – perhaps that’s a bit of hyperbole at this juncture, but I pray it comes to fruition. With so much of the Western world led by puppet governments we are doomed if the people don’t take it back** from the mini-tyrants being led by the nose by Tyrants with a capital T.

Let’s not be ruled by the weenie liars-in-chief.  “Power to the People” as the Leftists once smugly demanded.

So even if you’ve already seen this grand video mocking Castrudeu’s speech vilifying the #TruckersForFreedom watch it again this fine Friday. It encapsulates so well what’s happening in our parallel universes.

THIS is a video for the ages!
  
Sound on. Enjoy.#TruckersForFreedom pic.twitter.com/HbiytHmXy4

— Fringe Minority Territory of Timtoria (@itsTim_eh) February 3, 2022

So be the force. Back up if necessary and ram it again, until the whole thing comes tumbling down if necessary.

Godspeed Canada The world is watching!

** The Left has deemed “take it back” to be racist, so use it with care: You may get placed in Twitter/Facebook jail

Let’s Go Brandon: Episode #386

“Tis strange - but true; for truth is always strange; Stranger than fiction.” – Lord Byron

You’ve got to feel a little sorry for the Babylon Bee:

It’s hard to write better satire than the MSM:

Are you paying attention Mr. Trudeau?

Shut up! No you shut up!

I don’t really see how this ends well for Castrudeau. Change my mind.

 

And this just in:                  January 2021 CPI – 0.6%      

                         January 2022 CPI – 7.5%

Let’s Go Brandon! (Brandon has now been in office 386 days, but who’s counting?)

If Irony Didn’t Exist The Left Would Have To Invent It

It was the Left that prematurely pronounced the death of irony 20 years ago:

“In the dark days after September 11, Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter famously declared: ‘I think it's the end of the age of irony.’”

They have spent the intervening two decades disproving their own thesis. Take, for example, that old skinhead, snake-faced Clinton apologist James Carville. The man with one of the most punchable faces in America…

tells his podcast audience (all 25 of them) that he’d like to punch unvaxxed people in the face.

"I wish what they’d do is pass a law to make you immune from liability if you punch some unvaccinated person right in the face, which I’d really like to do. If you ask me what’s my first reaction to you if you’re not vaccinated, you don’t have any medical reason not to be, you’re a piece of s---, OK? I just want to punch you in the god----ed face. That’s the way I look at these people," Carville said. – Fox News

That may not be technically irony, but close enough for government work. Certainly the kind of government work that James, ever the classless snake-bellied mercenary, has always done. The Clintons’ “drag a hundred dollar bill through a trailer park” pit-bull has always held us in contempt. He spent years trashing the Tea Party and its members simply for protesting against “the Affordable Care Act” which many still consider to be unconstitutional. He continues to get his spittle all over people who dare defy likewise unlawful government mandates. (Defying Trump however, that form of Resistance he considered noble and selfless acts of courage.)

It’s good when the Left does it

But then, ironic behavior abounds wherever Democrats congregate and impose policy. Like this recent policy created by some of the Brandon Administration’s  brightest functionaries: amid their own hysterical wailing and teeth gnashing over the escalating number of deaths due to to drug overdose  (aided and abetted in no small part by their own open border policies - which is ironic in itself) they have come up with an ironic solution. They plan is to spend $300 million to make it easier for drug addicts to use drugs. Yes. They will fund ‘programs that hand out syringes and crack pipes to prevent infection and promote ‘racial equity'.’

Applicants for the program get priority if they serve 'underserved communities,' such as African Americans or Native Americans, or LGBTQ people.

Don’t you love it when Democrats think “racial equity” means assuming that all of their favorite special interest groups - African Americans, Native Americans, and LGBTQ people - are prone to abusing drugs?

Can you stand one more ironic twist to this ingenious plan? While they will be making it easier for illegal drug users to use their drug of choice they continue to put the screws to doctors who write scripts for the legitimate use of opiate pain relievers to help their patients with uncontrollable pain.

So let me get this straight: we open the southern border to welcome gang banger drug dealers but slam the door in the face of people dealing with legitimate, intractable pain. And then Brandon and company will be surprised when fatal fentanyl overdoses continue to climb. (Would you like to take a guess as to the last time your doctor gave anyone a fentanyl prescription?)

If irony did not exist the Democrats would have to invent it.

When We Were Very Young…

You tend to Harvest what you sow. Not Neil Young, he was lucky. Despite a 40 plus year drug and alcohol fueled musical career

Neil Young grew up to be a reformed substance abuser (Imus would have called him a dry drunk, and he would know) who feels that making one smart decision in his entire life - when faced with the choice of quitting drugs and alcohol or imminent death he chose life: bully for him. He now lives under the illusion that this one smart thing makes him an expert on everything.

Still crazy after all these years

Neil Young takes aim at Spotify CEO, big banks: the ex-druggie is now calling on Boomers to “ditch the companies contributing to the mass fossil fuel destruction of Earth,” and proceeded to encourage people take their money from JPMorgan Chase & Co., Citigroup Inc., Bank of America Corp. and Wells Fargo & Co.

Here’s my position: if these old dried up celebrities, dripping with the dividends of capitalism's benefits and rewards, want to tell the rest of us how to live our lives, they should run for political office like the rest of the people who think we rubes need to be guided by our betters.

And if you’re going to be an old, aging rocker, be more like Eric Clapton and Van Morrison.

As for Neil: take a look in the mirror, you were never smart.

And now you’re not even young.

Hint: It’s Not the Truck Drivers

Things are clearly getting out of hand in Ottawa:

Trucks, trucks, everywhere!

The peaceful protests against government overreach is growing and spreading to other Canadian cities as well, that can’t be good. Eventually freedom loving Canadians will realize that there’s more of them than there are of their autocrat oppressors - that’s when things get really interesting. In order to avoid that eventuality the mayor of Ottawa declared a state of emergency over the trucker protest yesterday,hoping to force their dispersal.

Strange, the mayor of Ottawa had no problem when BLM came to protest. But people who come with bouncy houses to demand freedom from tyrannical government mandates – they’ve got to go as they present a clear and present danger.

Ottawa Mayor Jim Watson comments on the convoy to CTV:

"It's disturbing when you see the protest turning into what looks like some kind of a fun carnival, where they've got bouncy castles, and hot tubs, and saunas" https://t.co/Q52l6xulvv

— Ryan O'Connor (@rpoconnor) February 6, 2022

Sometimes you’ve just gotta do something. Next, look for Prime Minister Justine Castrudeau to call in his Royal Canadian Mounties to deal with the  violent, racist, fringe minority group of truckers.

(apologies to the real RCMPs)

Can Bullwinkle and the flying squirrel be far behind?

If Castrudeau gets his way the the protest will be squelched and the world will once more be free to pursue and embrace the Covid-19 fueled call to arms for a better system of world government; a system previously known as communism which has never worked until now. But with far more enlightened rulers, it will work this time for sure.

And you may wish to rethink your plan to arrest the protesting truck drivers, Justin. Once you throw all the truck drivers in jail, you might exacerbate that ‘supply chain’ issue you’ve already got.

There may be bread lines

I think we might have identified the weak link.

Hint: it’s not the truck drivers.

The World Actually Is Crummier

I was taught (and retaught) table manners as a child. I suspect you had them driven into your noggin as well.

Chew with your mouth closed,

Lest your food fall out all over the place

don’t talk with your mouth full,

Deploy your entrenching tools correctly (aka hold your silverware correctly)   

Okay  

Okay  

No

And a myriad of others such as no elbows on the table (although I later learned that even Emily Post said it was appropriate to place your elbows on the table for conversations between courses when there were no plates on the table), no reaching across the table, take small bites, keep your food on your plate…etc..

They all seem so logical now. I still follow these rules but as I’ve aged I’ve noticed something a bit alarming: the food has begun to migrate from my plate against my will. This is most embarrassing in fancy restaurants, where the waiter comes by to sweep up any debris between courses with what used to look liker a miniature broom and dustpan but has evolved into a sleek pencil shaped instrument called a ‘table crumber’ which is far more discreet.

But at home I now notice that I need to wipe up the table or counter surfaces after every meal, not for sanitary purposes but rather for the esthetics as there seem always to be crumbs and/or other remains of the day that need to be dispatched. And that’s not all, often some detritus from the meal takes a suicidal leap to the floor which then requires either an unscheduled brooming or vacuuming.

I don’t know what to blame: have my table manners lapsed so terribly over the years as to create this debris field? Is it because both our table and counter seating is at “bar height” and the adrenalin rush created by a leap to freedom is too great to resist? In restaurants I can blame increased serving sizes crowding the plate but at home that’s definitely not an issue as our serving sizes have greatly diminished with time.

So I don’t know: are my newfound slovenly habits due to reduced dexterity due to age and arthritis? Is it distracted dining? I confess to using my tablet at table to peruse the Wall Street Journal these days, in lieu of a real newspaper. Or has the whole world just gotten a lot crummier? I’ll go with the later.

I blame the Artisan Bread movement: I never had all these crusty, crummy problems when we used Wonder Bread. Plus, since I’ve started using artisan bread we no longer have a never ending supply of snow socks.

If you’re old enough to understand this, and remember when Wonder Bread sold 2/45 cents, you might have an issue with this much crummier world too.