One Thing Is More Terrifying Than The Other: You Decide

In most parts of the civilized world, today is Sabbatum Sanctum; Holy Saturday - the day before Easter Sunday.

Butt as you know, around our rabbit hole we have to celebrate Easter incognito:

h/t Cripes Suzette

We call it “Spring Sphere Holiday” and while we go to church to celebrate during election years, in the off-years like this Big Guy usually just breaks out his private stash of jelly beans.

“Being Biden.” It’s a Gift, Harry.

Let’s kick the Easter Spring Sphere Holiday weekend off with the re-broadcast of episode one of Joey’s hilarious new reality show, “Being Biden.”  Funding for this program was made possible entirely by non-sequestered tax payer dollars.

Reality Bites

Did you hear the big bipartisan media news? Two, count ‘em, TWO new politically based reality shows! One is a Democrat and the other is a McRino.

First, on the Democrat side of the aisle: Being Biden is sponsored by the Big White, in response to one of our most popular Big White petition’s ever, demanding a Joey B reality TV show to reveal “the lighthearted side of politics in the midst of contentious and divisive national debates.”

Joey, lightheartedly evolving on gay marriage

Hump Day Noows Roundup

Most alphabet journ-O-lists like to wrap up the week on Saturday or Sunday giving their own “unique spin” on the week’s news. Butt, as you know, I’m not most alphabet journ-O-lists. Let’s get started with my new, journ-O-list style feature: Hump Day Noows Roundup.

Up first, Changing Our Royal Palace Guard:

On Tuesday, Big Guy named veteran Secret Service agent Lilly Raines as the Royal Palace Guard’s first female director, signaling his desire to change the culture at the male-dominated service, which has been marred by scandal.

Incoming Royal Palace Guard Director, Lilly Raines

So Let It Be Written: Mazel Tov!

Last night, the Wons continued their historic tradition of celebrating Passover with a modern, stylized, non-traditional Seder in the Big White. Big Guy, sans beanie, and Lady M joined a select group of powerful and rich friends in Big White’s “Old Family Dining Room” for the historic event.

“Hey, Michelle: watch where you’re pointing that.”

If You’re So Rich, Why Aren’t You Smart?

Today, a “Who said that?” quiz:

I. “I do think there are certain times we should infringe on your freedom.”

1. Hitler, on why the Jews had to relocate to Poland
2. Stalin, on why his “Great Purge” was necessary
3. Mayor Bloomberg, on why you can’t order a Big Gulp or own a gun

II. “I mean, “I do think at a certain point you’ve made enough money.”

1. Warren Buffet, on why we should tax millionaires and billionaires more
2. Michael Moore, on why capitalism sucks
3. President Obama, on why we should tax millionaires and billionaires more

A Jackass in the Desert does not a Messiah Make

It’s Palm Sunday and the new Pope Francis I celebrated his first Palm Sunday Mass at the Vatican.

Yesterday the Pope warned the faithful of the “tyranny of relativism;” 

“But there is another form of poverty! It is the spiritual poverty of our time, which afflicts the so-called richer countries particularly seriously. It is what my much-loved predecessor, Benedict XVI, called the “tyranny of relativism”, which makes everyone his own criterion and endangers the coexistence of peoples.’

In doing so, he echoed his predecessor's comment on the same subject: 

“We are building a dictatorship of relativism that does not recognize anything as definitive and whose ultimate goal consists solely of one’s own ego and desires.”  -Pope Benedict XVI

And I think by now we all know the pitfalls of setting goals based on Won’s own ego and desires:

I AM the Dream

Announcing The 1st, Historic FOM Flyover Fest: YOU Are Invited!!!

Yes it’s true. You have probably seen comments discussing the FOM Flyover Fest (FFF), butt let’s be honest, an event this ginormous deserves its own full post, and thanks to creeper, here it is. Thanks, to the efforts of JLHahn and creeper, you all have a chance to meet, shop, tour, break bread and sample the “Tea Trolley” with your fellow FOMs on April 20-21, 2013, in Sioux Falls, SD! Yup, in the real, physical world!