Vaya con Dios B***h!

Enough already about the salsa dance! I don’t usually embed videos, because they often loose my trans-imaging effects and reverse the refraction, but since the buzz won’t die down, I’ll make an exception for this:

It’s all over the news and the web that Mo gave Bo the cold shoulder after he went trotting with that little Mexican hotty, Thalia. As usual though, the media only gets it half right.

What really had Lady M torqued-off was the fact she specifically told Big Guy: no dancing at the Fiesta, dude. It had nothing to do with that picante vixen from the other side of the Rio Grande. It’s because every time she sees him out trying to cut the rug, all she can think of is “how in God’s name can a black man have so little rhythm!?!” And then she remembers about her white mother-in-law (may she rest in peace) and there’s no dealing with her for at least another 10 hours.

We haven’t had this much ice in the East Wing since that flap over Big Guy ogling the behind of that underage Brazilian chick. If you thought the apology tour was over at the end of the European trip, you should’ve been around the Big White the next week!

I think things have calmed down now. Mo promised to forgive BO for embarrassing her, and BO promised to have Thalia deported.

 

Technorati Tags: Thalia,Obama,Fiesta Latina

Does This Body Make My Head Look Big?

While I think MO has the Annie Hall thing nailed, I’m afraid Big Guy as Alvy just isn’t going to cut it - its just a little too creepy. I tried my best, but projecting Big Guy’s big head on Woody Allen’s frail little liberal frame is a no-fly zone. It could be that BO just isn’t right for the part of a whiney, neurotic New York Jew.

He might work better as a whiney, narcissistic Chicago Atheist, but anyone can typecast talent. Besides, Bill Ayers pretty much has that roll locked up.

This could still work out though. As you may recall, ‘fashion-forward’ these days does tend to favor the big headed look. So perhaps like other fads that look odd at first (shoulder pads and boob belts, for example) we’ll just adjust our sensitivities and accept BO’s disproportioned head for what it is: just another vacuous fashion statement. That way we can enjoy it while it’s here, knowing that it will be discarded in no time.

 

 

Regardless of anyone’s head size, I don’t think Lady M is going to want BO associating with that RL stick chick at all. Do you see how big her boobs are? And given the size of her feet, she might prove to be even more dangerous to dance with than Thalia (buy a last name, you little tramp).

Technorati Tags: Annie Hall,Woody Allen,Thalia,fashion,obama

Para Bailar LO Bama,

Seriously, is there anything happier than Latino music? Salsa, merengue –hot, hot, hot!  Yesterday was Fiesta Latina night at La Casa Blanco, and there was a lot of singing and dancing.

 George Lopez, Eva Longoria and Jimmy Smits

But first, I should mention that this big event took place “under the stars” on the South lawn. Well, actually under a big top. And while I’m sure the imagery of Mo and Bo having a “big tent” party will play well, I’m just hoping all their new Latin BFF don’t find out that the first two events in Lady M’s music series – jazz and country – were both held in the East Room. INSIDE the Big White.

But I tell you what, if the Latin beat doesn’t get you on your feet, you’re either comatose or British. Big guy, being neither - that we know of - was up on stage dancing the night away. I know, I know - he clearly got his rhythm from his white grandma. All the more reason to give him kudos for sashaying his booty around with JLo (the bitch), Mo and the girls while Thalía  sang “Amor a la Mexicana.”

As you can see, Lady M was radiant in her black top festooned with little gold squares. But I wished she had gone with something a little, well, hotter.  More like the one she wore to the Hispanic Caucus Awards Dinner. Although it might just be the big red globe that made it look hot.

Here’s another shot of the big tent out on the lawn:
By the way, that’s Sheila E. on the left. She used to be the sidekick of the artist previously and currently known as Prince. He could give Lady M a run for her money in the “best toned biceps” department. And that boy knows a thing or two about bling too.

All the guests raved about the event, with the only teensy-tiny criticism coming from Jose Feliciano  who said the concert was good, but Latin performers should be “part of the whole,” not just trotted out for Hispanic heritage month. Specifically, he said  “… the only time that Latinos are called upon is when the elections are around,” But that’s obviously not true, since Big Guy isn’t going to need them again until 2010.

Besides, I think Jose is biased. I happen to know for a fact that he played a gig here during the Reagan administration.

But over all, great party: great food, fun pink and green drinks, and music to die for. Huge, huge success: the grounds crew is still cleaning up confetti.

Technorati Tags: obama,fiesta latina night,JLo,thalia

Dancing in the O-zone.

Here is the big news of the week, so far: Lady M is bringin’ dancin’  to the Big White! Happy feet are here again. The series kickoff on September 7 is a tribute to Judith Jamison, retiring artistic director of the Alvin Ailey American Dance Theater.

We’ll also be kicking off our Fall ‘No Childs’ Fat Behind’ season with a special hula hooping lesson by Lady M:

Since Judith is now available for private consultation, Big Guy is considering hiring her as head coach for his ongoing dance contest series with the leaders of the Middle East. First thing she’ll have to do though is teach him how to lead:

 Big Guy, following the moves of Thalia. That got him hot water! 

…and move,

Que es mas macho? 

More like Lady M does:

  Again, we ask: who is most macho? 

In Big Guy’s defense however, it does help if you have a booty to shake.

Butt speaking of the dance series: yesterday we held the obligatory pre-show photo ops with the latest contestants for the Noble Peace Prize, Mid-East division:

 Contestants Mahmoud Abbas, Benjamin Netanyahu, King Abdullah II and Hosni Mubarak: they all look like they’re wee-weed up.

I don’t know who to tell you to put your money on for the dancing crown this season, but I can tell you who the “biggest loser” will be, if you want to bet on that: Bebe. The fix is definitely in on that one.

Sucking Lemons

 The march of the wooden soldiers: Left wingman, fall back!

“Try not to look like hostages, boys.”

 

Be sure to tune in for the season finale. We’ll have one of our trade mark “dancing in the O- zone” celebrations:

If Mama ain’t Happy, ain’t No One Happy.

All the glorious work that Big Guy has accomplished in the past week and still, people want to talk about the economy?

Well, at least they’re reporting good news this week. According to the MSM, Big Guy hit a triple for the team this month! The private sector created 260k jobs last month, (or 7000, if you take the smoke and mirrors (no relation) out of the calculations); food price increases drop, and now match inflation! Which is going up! (Thanks to the Bernanke’s “quantitative easing” programs.) I guess you’re not supposed to notice that almost every food product has been downsized while simultaneously going up in price, because if you factored that in, food price increases would be much greater than inflation.  And finally, gasoline prices dropped a fraction of a penny this week! After going up for 44 weeks straight! Oh, and did you hear that unemployment went up from 8.8% to 9%? No? That’s probably because the MSM didn’t report that.

Butt don’t worry, we are on correct path now, comrades. Let’s give it up for Big Guy!

Meanwhile, Lady M and Dr. Jill were holding an “event to mark the Mother's Day for military connected mothers, grandmothers, and spouses,” whatever that means.

Not sure about the dress, pin and shoes, butt love the chrome O-ring

…and major kudos to our dresser on the length

On the other hand, Dr. Jill may be spending a little too much time with Lady M.

And open toed, sling back, floral heels? Really?

You know - hosiery wouldn’t be a bad idea either.

 

 

Oh well, I’m sure all of the “military connected mothers, grandmother’s and spouses” really appreciated the effort the ladies put into this charity appearance.

Now if I may, just a quick recap of the Sink-O-de-Mayo party. As I’m sure you saw, Big Guy was feeling his oats after personally taking OBL out and decided he could take on Lady M as well:

"You do not want to be between Michelle and a tamale," joked the president. "It’s true. It’s true.” (Thanks Breeze!)

You may recall what happened a couple of years ago at the Fiesta Latina when Big Guy was foolish enough to get between Lady M and Thalia – truly one hot tamale:

You can tell that Lady M didn’t appreciate him bringing it up again the other night:

Don’t get too cocky, little man. Remember: if mama ain’t happy, ain’t no one happy. And it doesn’t look like mama’s happy.

Excellent round of discussion yesterday MO/YLs and MO/YDs! Great snark! Butt then, I expect nothing less from all of you. Lovely, really, just lovely.

Secret assignment is going well, butt my internal atomic clock is all screwed up.

Baby, It’s Cold Outside

 

Don’t bet on it.

Despite it being summer in the southern hemisphere, by all reports the temperature dropped below that record low in Johannesburg yesterday. I’ve gathered a series of images showing the gathering clouds that blew in the cold front.

As you can see here, some people are more sensitive to the falling barometric pressure that indicates an approaching storm. Some however are totally oblivious.

The insensitive ones are completely caught up in their own activities when all of a sudden – BLAM!

The deep freeze arrived like a fury:

“The -135.8-degree temperature is more like you'd see on Mars on a nice summer day in the poles,"

Or perhaps a fury scorned.

As soon as the full force of the storm cell appears, self preservation skills begin to kick in:

 “Lord, please don’t let me hurt him too bad; we still have to go to Hawaii later this month.”

Helle: “If I’d known Hurricane Michelle was going to strike, I would’ve brought an umbrella.”

Despite rolling up her sleeves to deck one of them, Lady M eventually calmed down and decided to use the teacher’s method of dealing with these situations; she just made them change seats.

“And another thing, Helle, I hate your people’s stinky little fish sandwiches.”

Whew! That was a close one! Big Guy sure doesn’t seem to do learning. This isn’t the first time he’s been caught in the middle of Hurricane Michelle. You all remember the Thalia incident don’t you?

Unfortunately, Jimmy Kimmel captured the whole thing for the Presidential library:

So maybe the interpreter for the deaf at Nelson Mandela’s memorial was a complete fake, whose signing of Big Guy’s speech was complete nonsense (hee):

Fraudulent signer/interpreter with…Barry. Hee.

butt Big Guy’s apologies were sincere; both the one he delivered to Raul, and the one he delivered to Lady M.

And hopefully all this blow back we’re getting over this international incident will teach Barry an important  lesson on proper protocol when headed into a storm: always remember to bring your umbrella.

That way you can avoid these awkward “clean-up after the storm” shots.

“Yeah, baby, you’re still my number one beard.”

Maybe I should nominate him for another Noble for this peace accord?

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Cross-Posted on Patriot Action Network